I know people that won’t tell their children about an upcoming event for fear of being nagged about it, non-stop, and I get that. But for me, I love the anticipation of a trip, concert or other event. I love planning it, having something to look forward to doing. I love imagining all the “fun” I’ll have….
also forgetting about the tedium of traveling, standing in lines and the sometimes obnoxious fellow travelers and the difficulty of pleasing everyone.
My problem is that it becomes over inflated and exaggerated in my mind. So what happens is that when the trip actually happens and I’m experiencing it, well, (struggling to admit this to myself) then sometimes, somehow, it seems a let down. It used to happen to me at Christmas time when I would go nuts planning the perfect presents and food and er.. well… my children were too little and not always appreciative. Let Down.
This is the time that I have to take a step back and remember that it’s about the experience.
All of the moments.
Being a writer has helped me to do this. I feel it has helped me in so many ways just to live a better life.
It sounds crazy, but sometimes, I have to remind myself that this is what I wanted to do and now…… just enjoy it!
Sitting in seat 15C, the aisle. Across the aisle a slack-jawed teen already stretched out with his headphones and eyes closed. A young toddler walks past me in the aisle carrying her small backpack on her back and looking pleased as punch with her independence. As they find their seats behind me. I have a feeling I’ll be hearing more from her later.
In the middle and window seat next to me is a young girl about ten traveling with her grandmother. The girl is telling joke after joke to her grandmother. I love listening to them talk and think about possible trips with my own grandchildren.
The flight attendant goes by asking me to make sure my bag is fully under the seat in front of me. As we take off, I settle in with my book, The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown, and all the other sounds around me seem to disappear.
Thank you for the phone call last night. Our talks mean a lot to me. You don’t always just talk, but you listen too. Thanks for asking about my day even when you’ve had such a bad day yourself.
Last night you were very upset and worried about your son. My grandson who is four years old and autistic. I heard your worries about him. Is he in the right preschool? Do they understand him? Do they realize how smart he is even when he can’t express himself clearly? Why is he upset and waking up in the middle of the night? Are the other kids and his teachers being kind to him? The sound in your voice was sheer despair.
You started working this year and it’s been difficult to trust him with others. I also heard doubt in your own abilities. Does he have enough therapies? Did I do the right thing going back to work? Am I doing enough to help my son?
Is it my fault?
Dearest daughter…. you are the most determined and stubborn child that I have ever known. You are a creative thinker and problem solver. If anyone can do this, you can.
I need you to know that there is not one “right” way to handle life. Being a mother of any child is filled things we could have or should have done “better”, but we are human and not perfect. We do the best we can. Your son is a beautiful, healthy, loving child with a grin as big and wide as the cheshire cat. You have always followed your insights and been inspired to do the best thing for him despite the unabashed judgements of others.
You are fine. Breath. I’m here for you, to listen and support.
This summer my youngest daughter got married. The month was August. The place was Nashville, Tennessee. The weather was extra hot and muggy. My oldest daughter had traveled there alone with her four children. Many of you will understand from this series of pictures how I gained a first hand experience of the phrase – “It was like herding cats!” watching her try to gather all the girls on the stairs for a family picture for the wedding.
I definitely try to avoid shopping at Walmart. I’m not a Walmart snob and it isn’t that I don’t like the products. It’s not because of the service, although the lines at our Walmart are horrendous. It does upset me that Walmart makes SO much money and it does not get passed on to the workers. But, the main reason is that there are just too many choices and I always end up spending more money than I anticipated.
Last night, It was a long day and late. I needed to make a salad for our birthday luncheon…. today. Big sigh. I’ll run to Walmart. It’s the closest and will be quick and easy I think. Umm… Wrong!
I ran into at least seven people that I knew. Talk. Shop. Talk. Shop. I could not, for the life of me,(does anyone else say this anymore?) find the mandarin oranges. Good Grief. I’ve walked past these things about four times. Every time I turned a corner, I almost crash into someone. Sorry. Excuse me. We meet again!
Whew, ready to check out and I look at the lines. Self check-out I think. Ding, Ding Dinging, starting to relax when….. unknown item, UNKNOWN ITEM????